OKAY

Okay. This is the word I have been chanting lately. It is what is getting me through things. Not sure how far will I get with this but for now I think I am okay. For now, okay is good.

All the hardwork I did for someone else goes into gutter because they think I was obliged. Okay, too naive of me but what will they do the next time around huh? I am rebuked for not hating enough on things around me (CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT?). Okay, I’d rather have love in my heart than hatred. ‘All songs you like are so crass!‘ Okay, I think I will choose crass over your ‘expensive’ music taste which is so brain harassing and deranged that my ears might quit on me and go to Himalayas. You see, you aren’t the only one who can judge. I am told that I am never calm and composed (Is that even bad?). Okay, so I am not besotted with the magical powers of inner peace but if that is how you would like to cover your unresponsive​ness up, whatever makes you happy. The guy I like doesn’t like me back. Okay. Oh who am I kidding? That’s really not okay. I am not really best at anything. Okay, no one will ask me to do anything which sounds best to me. No matter how hard I try, I just can’t stick to a disciplined routine. Okay, isn’t variety the spice of life?! No? Oh well! Nothing seems to be working out. Okay, everything will get fat and we can all wallow in obesity together. I crack the poorest of jokes. Okay, maybe I can offer to crack open brains with my jokes before surgeries. No? Okay. This is such a okay post. Okay, tell me how to make it better?

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Heart with a mind of its own!

Desirous, treacherous, vicious heart. Why did you hope or this would never start?

Caged with tall fences around, still you peeped into that beautiful soul. This is preposterous, I want to cry foul.

Now, this heathen heart wants to abandon me for him? Oh but he won’t accept you, for you, my heart, are too dim.

Unbidden and clueless, if this is how you had to fall. Why did I even guard you at all?

You cry and bleed, I feel the pain. Oh yes! How lovely it is to be this insane.

Squirm all you want my heart, in this unpleasant gloom, then you have to get back in the cage before the impending doom.

Don’t flutter or hope without cause, never again on my sleeve you will pause.

Love, you must, but please do not hope. Consequences of that are ill fated, so nope.

Now we both are in complete and utter despair, oh was it worth it, all that fanfare?

Slut Next Door!

Hello to my lovely progressive thinkers, this one is especially for you. For those who have a conservative thought process, you are most welcome to read on and be enlightened that perhaps yours is the most popular and hence correct viewpoint. I am loud, sometimes crass, misfit and very unladylike. Okay punish me for being loud but what on earth is misfit and unladylike? I sit with my legs open because it is comfortable and not because I am inviting a dick into my vagina. Is that clear enough? I work at office till 2am, sometimes even 6am and then take a cab home. I reach office at 11am and work my ass off till late because I like my work and it is important to me. Please try not to degrade it. I go on solo trips because I like to travel and there is no hidden agenda in that. I can say yes to travel with just about anyone if they are trustworthy, doesn’t mean I am an easy catch. I am a girl, not a ball. There is no such thing as an easy catch. Please don’t confuse my interest in traveling as my interest in those I say yes to travel with. Yes, I might guffaw too loud at a lewd joke, why is that a problem? It breaks my heart every time I or any other girl is subjected to this torture. Soon enough, they will attack to break our spirit too. Please, just stop. My parents are very supportive and kind people who have only ever encouraged me with full trust, they do not deserve to hear such trash. They are scared to let me do things alone, they have to calculate my safety at every step and yet they allow me. Least of all, respect that. You have no clue what I have been through, so you should not have any opinion on me. And those of you who know me and still have this opinion, please stop flaunting your support for girl empowerment. You are nothing but a hypocrite masquerading as a preacher of a cause you don’t actually support! Like a wise guy once said, “Excuse me! Ye lijiye aapki soch. Mujhe giri hui mili thi.”